Marland Monday: Oh I Hate That Name!
Welcome to Marland Monday! Wait, I know it’s not Monday…
then welcome to Marland Special Treat!
This summer I am studying the writing of Douglas Marland, considered one of the best writers in the soap opera genre. Why am I writing about him today? Because it was forty years ago today he wrote what many consider one of the iconic scenes in soap opera history.
To paraphrase Sophia Petrillo, picture it: Springfield, 1981.
Yes, 1981. Those crazy kids had Pac Man Fever, singing “Bette Davis Eyes” or a little song about a guy coveting his best friend’s girl late late at night. Reagan is in the White House, it’s Morning in America. And Nola Reardon on Guiding Light was about to get her just deserts.
I’ve discussed how Nola was a bad girl in an essay and how, in order for audiences to accept her and for her to evolve, she had to transform herself. You can say this was her starting point, where she hit bottom and realized she had to grab onto something, perhaps it was grace, to save herself from a bad ending.
Nola is pregnant, and she says it’s by Dr. Kelly Nelson, the resident Dr. McDreamy at Cedars. Only Kelly loves Morgan, the red-haired girl of his dreams. Kelly can’t remember having sex with Nola because he was drunk when it happened. Of course! Abortion was out of the question; no one on Guiding Light ever had abortions. I’m surprised there wasn’t a cancellation fee for all the times women scheduled an abortion then backed out at the last minute.
Anyway, Nola and Kelly were going to elope to Las Vegas. But Nola’s mom Bea had seen enough. She told Kelly the truth: it wasn’t his baby. He passed out dead drunk the night it was supposed to be conceived. Kelly was, well, let’s face it: he was pissed. It was time to set Nola straight.
Some background on the scenes…
There had been a writer’s strike that ended around June/July 1981. The episode of the confrontation was the first one to be taped after it was settled. It had been building up for a year. Lisa Brown and John Wesley Shipp were on the set. Marland knew he had to give the audience what they wanted: A hell of a payoff. So he phoned in the dialogue from his home in Connecticut. To quote Miss Davis herself: Fasten your seatbelts. It’s going to be a bumpy ride.
Nola walks into the Bauer patio with a suitcase. She’s wearing a white dress.
Nola: Kelly! Kelly, where are you?
Kelly appears by the doorway. Nola plays with her hair.
(what I love about this detail about her hair is that she’s trying to be an innocent little girl)
Nola: You’re looking at me like I’m a stranger or somethin’.
Kelly: You are.
Nola: What?
Kelly: How did I been so wrong about you?
Nola: Kelly, you’re not making any sense.
Kelly: Oh no, no Nola, you’re wrong. For the first time since I met you, I am finally making sense. This whole situation is finally making sense.
(During the scene Kelly can’t take his eyes off Nola. It reminds me of a line from ee cummings “the eyes of my eyes have been opened’)
Nola: I just wish I knew what you’re talking about.
Kelly: You’ve been playing me for a fool.
Nola: Now Kelly, you don’t look like you’re ready to go at all. I mean I rushed over here so we could leave for Las Vegas on time. I mean I went to the hairdresser…
Kelly: Enough! Damn it! I swear Nola if you say one more word I’m going to do something that I’m going to regret!
Nola: Kelly, please…
Kelly: Shut up!
Nola: Now I talked to you just three hours ago and…and everything was fine.
Kelly: I found out the truth, Nola. Everything you made me believe, everything you put me through since you first told me you were pregnant. Lies, lies, all of them.
Nola: No, no, Kelly…
Kelly: Lies. By God, if you knew how much pain I’d been in, ever since you told me about those lies about you and your damn baby.
Nola: Kelly, I’m pregnant. Dr. Davenport told you that in his office.
Kelly: Yes, yes he did, and my dear that is the only truth in all of this. But the child is not mine.
Nola: Of course it is. Of course, it is. I told you it happened the night of the Copper Lantern and you know, got a little drunk and…
Kelly: Yeah yeah yeah I got drunk you’re right about that, but whether you got pregnant that night or whether you didn’t is not my problem. It never was.
Nola: Oh Kelly, you’re wrong, because it happened that night, that’s the night it happened.
Kelly: It never was… (Kelly appears as if he’s in a trance)
Nola: Now Kelly you know I haven’t been with any guys…
Kelly: Oh, really? How do I know that?
Okay, confession. I had to stop transcribing in its entirety because it is such a long scene (I’m including it at the bottom of the essay) and there’s lots to unpack. What Marland did was let the scene build up. Kelly had to realize that Nola was lying, that she was perfectly happy for him to throw away his career as a doctor to get married. He couldn’t just tell Nola she was a bitch and leave her. Nope, he had to tell her word for word what she did. The following is from Guiding Light by Christopher Schemering, 1987:
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Kelly: Nola, how far along are you really? Not three months, not enough to have crying jags at the hospital, and certainly not enough to be experiencing morning sickness.
Nola: You know, Kelly, you know why I told you that. You know I couldn’t tell you about the pregnancy right away because I was afraid.
Kelly: You were afraid that I would find out the truth! That you were lying through your teeth! Oh, well that shouldn’t have concerned you, when it comes to deception you are a real pro! You are the fastest damn liar I’ve ever known! But I have to give you credit. I have to give you absolute credit. You almost pulled it off, you really did, but then again, you were really working with a real patsy. I mean, I have this basic flaw in my character. I trust the people that I like, and you knew that, didn’t you? So it looks like I made two big mistakes here. My first big mistake was to like you, and my second big mistake was to let you know it.
Nola (crying) The reason, the reason you’re saying all these things to me, the reason is because you feel guilty about the time we made love.
Kelly: We did not make love. Whatever, whatever the hell you want to call it, that baby is not mine. And don’t play the victim, Nola, because it’s not going to work. Morgan and I were almost the victims of your lies and tricks. Oh, I feel sorry for you. God, I feel sorry for you.
Nola: I don’t want your sympathy! I don’t want your pity!
Kelly: You don’t?
Nola: No!
Kelly: Well, I think it’s pretty damn generous of me to be able to feel pity for someone who almost ruined my life and my chance for happiness with Morgan.
Nola: (Howling) Oh! I…hate…that… name!
Kelly: Well, how bout that? Think of all the time and energy you wasted trying to convince her you were her best friend. You know Nola, you haven’t felt an honest feeling for anybody.
Nola: (Sniffling) For you! The feelings for you are all honest.
Kelly: That is the sickest lie of them all.
Nola: Everything I did was because I loved you, because I loved you and because I wanted to prove that I could make you happy.
Kelly: Including ruining my life? And my chances to be happy with Morgan?
Nola (trying to be cool, turns her back to Kelly) Well, Kelly why don’t you just go back to her? Yeah, why don’t you just go back to her and see if she can make you happy?
Kelly: That’s just what I’m going to do. And I’ll tell you what’s next, Nola. I’m going to get down on my knees and I’m going to beg her forgiveness if I have to, for ever getting involved with you.
Kelly leaves.
Nola: Now Kelly, you can’t go, you can’t leave like that! Please don’t go! Please don’t go now! (She starts to cry again) Please don’t go now. Please give me another chance.
Fade out
Okay, I’m back! What I love about the scene is after a while, Nola gives up. She simply gives up when she yells “Oh I hate that name!” But in the end, she tries to get him back. Just for a minute, you have empathy for her. Only a minute.
Forty years ago this month, Douglas Marland had to do what Jim Henson would tell people: take what you got and fly with it.
He took what he had, then gave it to Lisa Brown and John Wesley Shipp.
They flew.
Here’s the clips:
