Marland Monday: To Soar or Not To Soar?
Oh my goodness, is it Monday? The first Monday of the year? This means it’s…
Marland Monday!
Oh man, hope your holidays were good. Isn’t it great to kick 2021 to the curb? It’s been a difficult year for me, but one of the good things was starting the Marland Monday series. I wasn’t sure anyone would read these essays; Mr. Marland has been dead for almost thirty years, so I wasn’t really sure if people would read. I’m not getting huge Medium numbers, but it’s still decent and I want to thank everyone for reading my work last year. Now on to 2022!
On Young and Restless, Victoria Newman is talking with her ex Billy Abbott about sending their children Johnny and Katie to boarding school. This is a special code. Six months from now, or maybe even sooner, they won’t come back the ages they’re supposed to be (Ten and seven) they’re coming back as teenagers. The show needs new teenagers, hence the kids have to go through Soap Opera Rapid Aging Syndrome, a term coined by former Soap Opera Weekly’s editor Mimi Torchin, SORAS for short.
SOARS has been around forever. Guiding Light’s Mike Bauer was born on March 22, 1952. Twelve years later, he was a lawyer with a baby on the way (that baby-Hope Bauer, would be SOARSED and be a pre-teen by 1970) His younger brother Ed was born in 1954. Twelve years later he was a medical student. Eventually, you realize that children on soaps will never go through an awkward phase, never get acne. Once a boy’s voice starts to change, it’s time to get a hotter version of the kid who already has a deep voice. Girls aren’t allowed to have acne; the minute a pimple popped up, the girl popped out, and a girl with clear skin popped in. I’m not saying this is right. All I can say is that’s show business.
When I started Marland Mondays, I was intrested if Marland used SOARS. For the life of me I couldn’t remember. Here’s what I noticed: he didn’t use it too much. When he did use it, it was to further the plot and it helped the story. When he came to Guiding Light, he noticed something: there were no teenagers. There were some young people but not that many. He had nieces and nephews in their teens. They watched TV. Why shouldn’t they see characters their age on a soap?
He used one of his rules and asked for advice his fifteen year old niece this question: What would be your biggest fantasy? She replied that if a collage man thought she was “the most special thing in the world.” Enter Kelly Nelson, Ed Bauer’s godson. Morgan was on her way. But Morgan needed someone her age. Wait a minute, Dr. Sara McIntyre had a son, TJ? Call him Tim. Let’s age him to 16, maybe 17. Have him come home from Lincoln Prep, the boys prep school (friends of mine used to say when a boy went to Lincoln prep, they received growth hormones and came home a man) and bam, we have a triangle. Get that kid who was in that movie with John Belushi, Kevin Bacon. (someday we’ll explore the six degrees of Kevin Bacon here) That’s how Tim Werner was SOARSED and Kevin Bacon got his second big role.
The second time Marland SOARSED a character was Emily Stewart on As The World Turns. In Marland’s original story (found by writer Tom Casiello) Holden Snyder was named Clem. Good old Clem! Clem was supposed to be in a love story with Emily, but Emily’s return was delayed. Clem (Thank God) was renamed Holden and Marland instead made a triangle with Holden, Lily, and Dusty. Emily in real life would’ve been fourteen (my mother and Emily’s mom Susan were pregnant the same time) in 1986, so he had to age Emily slightly to eighteen. Again, it made sense. Emily was a member of a core family, the Stewarts. Raised by an alcoholic neglectful mother, Emily sometimes resented her older sister Betsy for the fact Betsy was raised by her grandparents and stepmother Kim, surrounded by love. Wasn’t Emily a Stewart too? Again, Marland knew SOARING Emily would have possibilities for drama.
So what have we learned from Marland’s use of SOARING? That he used the technique sparingly, and only when it could help move the plot forward. The two characters he did SOAR hadn’t been on the canvas for a while, so it wasn’t jarring to see them as teenagers. In other words, he did it well.
Here’s hope we soar through the new year.
Quick FYI: I wrote about another GOAT last week.
Tune in next week…
